Cause of my Frustration

I just read Ms. Roleth's blog entry regarding frustrations. I was able to relate to her to the point of sharing my own frustration here.

So what made me frustrated? It is losing weight. Or Am I? I beg to disagree. However, it alarmed me because there were two people who mentioned that I look thinner these days.


The Instances.

Last April 15th, Sir Randy told me "Ms. Renin, parang mas pumayat ka ngayon?"
I made face.
Sir Melvin, who was with Sir Randy, said "Puyat kasi nang puyat siguro."
"Nakakataba kaya ang mapuyat" Sir Randy interjected.
I said "Ofcourse not."

I left the issue hanging, but I was really affected because my recent goal is to gain weight and look a bit sturdy. *sigh*


Last Monday, April 20, I saw and chat for a while with Sarah Natanauan, a former co-employee who was then transacting some business in school.

Before I bid my goodbye, she mentioned "Renin,parang mas pumayat ka ngayon?" I answered "Ofcourse not."
What else should my answer be? I do not think I lost weight since I last saw her (which was ages ago).


I have not checked my weight yet --- I actually do not have the heart to do so or I will just be more frustrated. No. No. No. I am frustrated (period) Why will I not be? I am eating more quantity of food (more carbo and protein rich) than usual so I expect to gain more weight (I am tired of being underweight). But why do some people think I look like otherwise? :(

I am finding hard to reach my goal and these two comments did not boost my morale. *sigh* But I will prove them wrong ---hope so, soon...


Now, who says losing weight is the a concern? I do believe it exert a lot of will and effort. But hey, gaining weight is also tough for people like me who have high level of metabolism.

Wake up call.
The observation made by Sir Randy and Sarah reminded me to keep this in mind:"Eat more. Exercise. Gain weight is my goal."

How about you? What makes you frustrated?

P.S. As of April 24: Added in the list of individuals who took notice of my physique is Anthony.

My happiness

Indeed! Happiness can come from the simplest of things [toni]

Last August 2007 I made Happy, Jolly, Glad... Name it! where I list down the things that made me happy.

I believe, then and now, that happiness is relative. I now add it lingers no matter how short the duration I felt or realized it...It takes root from within... Is it also true to you?

Here is my renewed HAPPINESS list:
* a sound sleep and WAKING UP without being forced to
* reading Lucy Maud Montgomery's works
* mayonnaise
* unexpected text message from ---
* Approved loan application of my co-employees
(a Thank-you-God-moment for me)
* noticing how the cactus I bought grows
* seeing flowers bloom

I also find two blogs on happines that inspired me:
Treasures from Heaven and rejesus blog
(though these did not discussed happiness from simple things)

photo credits

Ask Angela

Ms. Eva lend me this book last Monday during lunch break. She was so enthusiastic while handing it to me. She even told me a gist.

I didn't read it immediately though(which was my usual response when receiving a a loaned book)simply because it is about a dog (I was not a fan of dogs, I am a pussy lover). So I left it in my bookshelf until I decide to browse it this morning.

I told myself "I shouldn't have delayed reading it." I admit that the book touched my heart. I have realized a lot of simple and important things from this book. Those things that I have neglected since I can not remember when.

Here are some:

* Count your blessings.

* There really isn't any special place that we're going to, like a destination. It's all in the walking. So lighten up and enjoy the trip and sniffs.

* Life goes better with someone to play with.

* Trust and affection may come as gifts, but are most often earned through patience and an open heart.

* Make a fuss over friends you see. Greet them as if it's been years since the last time you met... Really share your glee because every one deserves to be treated like a celebrity once in a while.

* When giving a hug, be polite and ask first. Notice that in a hug there is no difference between the hugger and the hugged. Hugging is an equal opportunity way of giving what you need to get, ang getting what you need to give.

* Even when you adore someone, keep in mind that everyone needs some room for their own body. Everybody takes up space and needs some free air around them to breathe. It is real act of love not to rowd or smother with love the one you love.

* For thrills and excitement, take the road less traveled. There is nothing like a new views and fresh frangrances to add bounce to your step.

* Set aside five minutes for quite each day. Allow nothing to get accomplished in this period.

* Recognize how you feel when you're scared. Grow used to it. Don't plan on doing anything really courageous without it.

* Daydream.

This book is very inspiring. It is empowering. The approach of the author is also awesome. This is a must read.

A Witness' Guilt

I witnessed an accident this morning. A man, who happened to be my co-passenger in a jeepney bound for Turbina-Real, was hit by a car while crossing the street. I was shocked that I was still for a second. But honestly, I was relieved because I was not the one hurt. On the other hand I also felt guilty, guilty that I have not done something which I could have done.

Here was the scenario. All the passengers of the jeepney I took briskly crossed the street but suddenly halted in the middle of the road upon noticing an approaching fast-moving car. The man on my right side did not stop walking and was the one hurt in the leg. I looked back at the man but did not do anything to help. I continued crossing the street instead; I continued to walk as if accidents like the one I witnessed are ordinary occurrence where I can simply shrug my shoulders.

The incident occurred in a flash, but it stayed in my consciousness. While in the bus, I felt so uneasy. I felt guilty, guilty that I did not even bother to remind the man that a fast-moving car is near. I felt guilty because I thought that if only I have done such small gesture the man may have been spared from being hurt. If only…

On the other hand, I also thought that if only the man was more careful and faithfully follow the stop, look, and listen SOP he could have safely crossed the street. But no matter how I try to put aside my guilt feelings I am still irresponsible about the incident. I still feel guilty, and I know I am really guilty.

The Saving Graces

Getting hold of Patricia Gaffney's The Saving Graces is very timely. The twist and turn of the story made me more optimistic regarding the relationship I have with my colleagues/classmates/friends whom I would certainly seldom meet and be with after our graduation on April 21.

The four women characters of the story faithfully meet once a week to discuss anything under the sun. They shared laughter, truimphs, dreams, failures, and gossips. They face every challenge as a group, though a cliche exist once in a while. They are alwayson each others side. They are all and one. This kind of relationship is somethingworth having and keeping. *sigh*

I am ardently praying that we, FAITH AB Psychology 2007, namely, Liz, July, Jen, Yen, Cel, Renin, Karen, Emy, Sarah, Hanzel and Love, will stay in touch no matter what, as each of us struggle in the juggle of real world. I am hoping that we will not simply settle with exchange of calls, text messages or emails, but rather find time to meet even once in a blue moon.

Reflecting thoroughly, I have realized that it is not the time spent with each other, but rather the essence of our friendship that is kept ablazing in our hearts that matters most. Yes! togetherness counts in maintaining friendship, but onlyto an extent; it is still the bond of love that makes friends tightly connected. Now, what I should pray for is God's will for us, AB Pasaway stick with each other... til the end.

This is not a simple wishful thinking. I firmly believe that we will forever be glued with each other.

God bless to all of us, Pasaway!

^_^

Reactivation

I have been an inactive blogger for almost four months. I cannot give any concrete reason for this but my extreme writing laziness. My inactive blogger status is a shame and a constant cause of my own dismay. However, I have been a frequent blog-hopper. I also never missed a Blog-O-Rama article. I have updated myself regarding the country's blogosphere.

But my dormant period is over, I am here (again) to strike back. I'll first attend to the last requirements in our thesis, then I'll get the ball rolling.

i am glad to be back! ^_^